Weighing In—Honoring Fathers on their Day

One of the greatest honors that exist is being able to take care of those who have taken care of you.

Our parents and all your “cousin” elders who sacrificed their lives with all their time, money and effort for us, deserve our utmost respect.

You hear it everywhere these days: 60 is the new 40, 70 the new 50, and so on.

The reality is parents are living longer and may remain independent well into their later years.

Recently, I saw a TV commercial that advertises, senior living availability space for elderly parents.

“A place for mom and dad. Well some of you really need to hear this!

A place for dad--is with you!

Those wonderful other influencers in your life who loved and cared for you...they didn’t constantly look for “a place for you”—so you make it work!

Now before you go bitter on me—I’m not talking about those extreme, bad parenting, abusive situations, but I am referring to those dads who you know, were there for you; those who sacrificed for you; those who really did do the best they could for you—and they worked...just like you, and was there when you were sick, when you didn’t know what to do about a situation, and through all the growing up activities, and functions, b'day parties, etc…so now take the time to include them in your "busy" life.

It seems as if many are looking for ways out of the responsibility of caring for those who cared for them, so as not to disrupt what they call “my own life!”

Without those good, timely mentors and influencers in your life —you wouldn’t even know “how” or what to go after in life!

Those of you that have had bad influencers in your life—“we got you!”

God always has a “ram in the bush!” (ie…he has somebody else). Someone to love you beyond your inabilities, propensities and dysfunctions.

So you pay if forward for those who were there for you. They’re not trying to get in your business but to extend “genuine” love beyond what you have experienced as “love!”

I was a Guardian-ad-litem (GAL),—appointed, along with an attorney, by a district court judge to investigate, advocate and determine the needs of abused and neglected children, for about ten years, so I've seen first hand what could happen when people aren't loving and respecting the way the Word says to; so they keep the cycle going!

The treadmill of "lack of respect” can permeate every generation. Perhaps this that’s why we now have a crisis where young people just can’t seem to be able to pick up the baton and progress beyond what their parents did—even with obtaining all these degrees, as if they will be the magic wand to success and prosperity. You really do have to do things right—God’s perspective—not yours, nor your friends! Since He made a whole world and is still relevant, thousands of centuries later—I believe He knows…

I know many of you will think, “what kind of father’s day message is this?” but you must realize that if we as senior influencers can “point your arrow” and shoot you in the direction of a wonderful life by insisting that you practice human respect and dignity for your own parent, this will go well with you as you move about this life!!

Human respect and dignity for parents means your being committed to honoring their right and expectation from you, to be respected by you; to allow them to live with security, self-esteem, and freedom of expression, without being constantly being reminded, and spoken to, as if they are not needed any longer; as if getting older is a curse or a liability!

It also means that you must take the opportunity to assist them with their own needs and to involve them in your life!

Just showing up annually with a gift that you ran in and randomly picked up, without any thought to their personality, for the “quick occasion,” is not honoring them in life, let alone on this father-honoring” day! (mother’s day too) You are not a robot on repeat!

Respect them enough to at least give something that is practical and one that matches their personality.

Genuine, authentic love can be felt, lip love is just a big, talking head, and people know it.

Remember, the maker of the universe had said—"Honor thy father and thy mother,” that your days will be long and prosperous —not one day--but every day of your life!

According to the teachings of almost every religious and spiritual institution, the commandment to honor father and mother is practiced, and reveals God's desired order of Love – first God, then parents, then others.

It will bring both spiritual and temporal rewards of peace and prosperity, while failure to do so—harms you!

In any particular family, the consequences of dishonoring a parent can range from them, having mild feelings of anger, hurt, and sadness to intense anger, disappointment, extreme hurt, and disownment.

Yes…you heard that—honoring parents is a commandment! A big one in the sight of God Almighty!

But did you also know that it’s about more than just obeying what they say?

When you focus on getting to know your parents and building a relationship with them, you can find lots of ways to honor them. Even the little things count!

Ways to Honor this Father’s Day:

Talk with him about your plans for the future. Ask his opinion.

Do one of the chores he usually have to do.

Give a sincere compliment. Tell him when he’s doing a good job.

Ignore your phone during dinner or family gatherings.

Control the volume of your voice, even when you’re upset.

Spend time doing some of his favorite activities with him. (If you don’t know what those are yet, just ask!)

Tell him about something fun you did with your friends recently.

Make a goal to tell your friends only positive things about him!

Ask him how his day went. Bonus points if you ask about a specific thing you know was making him stressed.

Even if he is not where he should be, you do the right thing, if he doesn’t. It comes back to you…trust that God knows all the parameters of why you have this particular parent. He’ll tell you what he was thinking and why this person is your dad!

Above all else….tell him you love him. NOT SEND A TEXT, IF YOU ARE LOCAL…This honor is show & tell!

Remember it’s not all about you now… it’s his time now!

Now go do something great with your dads-whether its your biological dad, a stepdad, a stand in mentor-dad...or daddy God—everybody has one!

Much love…